California is a fine place to live - if you happen to be an orange.
Fred Allen
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I sometimes lie awake at night trying to think of something funny that Richard Nixon said. -
I think a lot of times on TV we see caricatures - that's what's funny. -
It's funny. When I saw the script in my inbox and it said 'Sparkle,' I thought, 'For real? It's really called 'Sparkle?'' I was wondering, too, how does 'Jordin Sparks as Sparkle' sound? -
I got pregnant at 40 by surprise. It's funny, because when we found out we were pregnant, I said, 'Okay, let's experience that.' You just have to just go with it because it's rare. -
It was always a fantasy of mine growing up - my favorite program was always 'Little House on the Prairie' - so I always wanted to wear those looks. When I was a child, I wouldn't let my mom put me in anything but calico dresses and now... whaddaya know, every day I'm in a calico dress, basically, so it's kind of funny.
More quotes by Fred Allen
- We are living in the machine age. For the first time in history the comedian has been compelled to supply himself with jokes and comedy material to compete with the machine. Whether he knows it or not, the comedian is on a treadmill to oblivion.
- An advertising agency is 85 percent confusion and 15 percent commission.
- My father never raised his hand to any one of his children, except in self-defense.
- Most of us spend the first six days of each week sowing wild oats then we go to church on Sunday and pray for a crop failure.
- I don't have to look up my family tree, because I know that I'm the sap.