Why don't you get out of that wet coat and into a dry martini?
Robert Benchley
More from: Robert Benchley
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Always remember your kid's name. Always remember where you put your kid. Don't let your kid drive until their feet can reach the pedals. Use the right size diapers... for yourself. And, when in doubt, make funny faces. -
Sometimes laughing isn't the best judge of what's funny, 'cause I think there's a lot of things that are really funny that don't make you laugh, that don't make you physically, audibly make a noise, but is something that is much more powerful than that. -
Who knew Rob Lowe was funny? On 'Parks and Rec,' we've got some of the funniest comedy writers, some of the funniest comedians in the world working there. And if anything, we don't just effuse to one another and be like, 'Oh, Rob Lowe's really funny,' if he wasn't. -
Brought up to respect the conventions, love had to end in marriage. I'm afraid it did. -
All right everyone, line up alphabetically according to your height.
More quotes by Robert Benchley
- A real hangover is nothing to try out family remedies on. The only cure for a real hangover is death.
- I know I'm drinking myself to a slow death, but then I'm in no hurry.
- A real hangover is nothing to try out family remedies on. The only cure for a real hangover is death.
- You might think that after thousands of years of coming up too soon and getting frozen, the crocus family would have had a little sense knocked into it.
- It took me fifteen years to discover I had no talent for writing, but I couldn't give it up because by that time I was too famous.