If a man watches three football games in a row, he should be declared legally dead.
Erma Bombeck
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My motto was always to keep swinging. Whether I was in a slump or feeling badly or having trouble off the field, the only thing to do was keep swinging. -
Growing up, sports was my outlet, my way to portray a personality. I was very shy around people but, through sports, something I was good at, I was able to make friends. -
Unlike any other business in the United States, sports must preserve an illusion of perfect innocence. -
We should confine booing in sports arenas to sport. I love a good boo as much as the next football fan. -
The only consistent hobby I've had is studying Spanish and French because of some delusion of grandeur to work around the world. I love sports but usually I'm looking for the next job.
More quotes by Erma Bombeck
- Youngsters of the age of two and three are endowed with extraordinary strength. They can lift a dog twice their own weight and dump him into the bathtub.
- Being a child at home alone in the summer is a high-risk occupation. If you call your mother at work thirteen times an hour, she can hurt you.
- A friend never defends a husband who gets his wife an electric skillet for her birthday.
- Thanks to my mother, not a single cardboard box has found its way back into society. We receive gifts in boxes from stores that went out of business twenty years ago.
- Car designers are just going to have to come up with an automobile that outlasts the payments.