I take a very practical view of raising children. I put a sign in each of their rooms: 'Checkout Time is 18 years.'
Erma Bombeck
More from: Erma Bombeck
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It is wonderful how much time good people spend fighting the devil. If they would only expend the same amount of energy loving their fellow men, the devil would die in his own tracks of ennui. -
Rest is not idleness, and to lie sometimes on the grass under trees on a summer's day, listening to the murmur of the water, or watching the clouds float across the sky, is by no means a waste of time. -
Instead of worrying about what people say of you, why not spend time trying to accomplish something they will admire. -
If you believe in your heart that you are right, you must fight with all your might to do it your way. Only dead fish swim with the stream all the time. -
Try not to have a good time... this is supposed to be educational.
More quotes by Erma Bombeck
- Youngsters of the age of two and three are endowed with extraordinary strength. They can lift a dog twice their own weight and dump him into the bathtub.
- Being a child at home alone in the summer is a high-risk occupation. If you call your mother at work thirteen times an hour, she can hurt you.
- A friend never defends a husband who gets his wife an electric skillet for her birthday.
- Thanks to my mother, not a single cardboard box has found its way back into society. We receive gifts in boxes from stores that went out of business twenty years ago.
- Car designers are just going to have to come up with an automobile that outlasts the payments.