You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older. Little things like being spanked every day by a middle-aged woman: Stuff you pay good money for in later life.
Emo Philips
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There was a time when a fool and his money were soon parted, but now it happens to everybody. -
Innovation has nothing to do with how many R amp& D dollars you have. When Apple came up with the Mac, IBM was spending at least 100 times more on R & D. It's not about money. It's about the people you have, how you're led, and how much you get it. -
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I have no one to leave the money to. I'm a single man. I like spending my money. -
You have to go broke three times to learn how to make a living.
More quotes by Emo Philips
- I was sleeping the other night, alone, thanks to the exterminator.
- A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.
- Probably the worst time in a person's life is when they have to kill a family member because they are the devil. But otherwise it's been a pretty good day.
- When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bicycle. Then I realised that the Lord doesn't work that way so I stole one and asked Him to forgive me.
- How many people here have telekenetic powers? Raise my hand.