If you're going to do something tonight that you'll be sorry for tomorrow morning, sleep late.
Henny Youngman
More from: Henny Youngman
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You wrestle one night, get up the next morning and fly out to the next city. You try to work out, you try to get some food into you and, lo and behold, you have to go work again. You are living out of a suitcase. -
And the greeter is what sets the tone for this company and I've been on TV a little bit this morning. -
Freedom itself was attacked this morning by a faceless coward, and freedom will be defended. -
I wake up some mornings and sit and have my coffee and look out at my beautiful garden, and I go, 'Remember how good this is. Because you can lose it.' -
Always get married in the morning. That way if it doesn't work out, you haven't wasted the whole day.
More quotes by Henny Youngman
- Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays.
- I've been in love with the same woman for forty-one years. If my wife finds out, she'll kill me.
- My brother was a lifeguard in a car wash.
- I know a man who doesn't pay to have his trash taken out. How does he get rid of his trash? He gift wraps it, and puts in into an unlocked car.
- My dad was the town drunk. Most of the time that's not so bad but New York City?