Henny Youngman

Discover the 10 best quotes by Henny Youngman. Make your own poster too.

Do you know what it means to come home at night to a woman who'll give you a little love, a little affection, a little tenderness? It means you're in the wrong house, that's what it means.

Henny Youngman

home

Do you know what it means to come home at night to a woman who'll give you a little love, a little affection, a little tenderness? It means you're in the wrong house, that's what it means.

Henny Youngman

love

Do you know what it means to come home at night to a woman who'll give you a little love, a little affection, a little tenderness? It means you're in the wrong house, that's what it means.

Henny Youngman

marriage

The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.

Henny Youngman

marriage

She's been married so many times she has rice marks on her face.

Henny Youngman

marriage

Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays.

Henny Youngman

marriage

When I told my doctor I couldn't afford an operation, he offered to touch-up my X-rays.

Henny Youngman

medical

I've got all the money I'll ever need, if I die by four o'clock.

Henny Youngman

money

What's the use of happiness? It can't buy you money.

Henny Youngman

money

If you're going to do something tonight that you'll be sorry for tomorrow morning, sleep late.

Henny Youngman

morning

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